(© Queen B)

“It’s a rugrat boy!”

Someday I’ll probably say “I’m tired of that damn snotty-nosed kid! Go to your room!”

But right now, my nephew is (Objetively speaking) one of the best things on Earth.

After watermelon and pizza of course.

(© Ne-Yo)

“NOT buying any would be a miracle…”

I’ve listed every pair of shoes I own.
Told myself I have way too many.
Went to the New Look store across the street.
Bought two pairs of sneakers (two pairs for 14€, I’d be crazy to pass on that bargain).

Jesus fed the multitude, I’m feeding my closet. Same process, different results (and to think that I got rid of 20-25 pairs two years ago).

Jumping to another subject: now I get why there’s so many animated gifs on Tumblr. These things are friggin’ addictive (and I’ll continue making them until I get sick of it – and trust me it’s not gonna happen soon)!

(© Jet)

“A hair’s breadth from being forgotten.”

I’m an attention whore. I can’t stay very long without feeling the urge to write on this blog. Plus, I’ve deleted both my accounts on Facebook AND Twitter, my website is now the only way for me to tell the world that I loooove myself. And to have my 15 minutes of fame – although for that part I could give you the link to one of my 345 sextapes, but you can see closeups of my butt in all of these. So I can’t (but I bet you can find them in any decent sexshop).
And I’ve changed my hairstyle (which is one of the most important subject on Earth).
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(© The Pythons)

“I like Chinese (people) (and food)”

Tricotcotte tagged me. Of course, that title has nothing to do with her asian origins, I’M NOT A RACIST OKAY?! It really is because 1/ I like Monty Python AND 2/ this tag is about a Chinese portrait; I’m kinda glad she tagged me because I was running out of ideas for a new post.

Beware, if the computer you’re using is still running under Windows 97, I advise you not to click on the link below, that post is slightly picture heavy, I don’t want your computer to stay out for the next 8 days.

As a Chinese portrait, that tag is about a list of sentences starting with “If I were…”, which I’m happy to tag along with (pun intended) because I’m an attention whore, any occasion to talk about myself is fine with me (that’s pretty damn why I’ve got a blog).
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(© Mariah Carey)

“The REAL Xmas wishlist”

Christmas is coming fast; everyday a new wishlist (well dozens of them) pops here and there on your favourite blogs. Expensive stuff, cute stuff, stuff for people on a budget… Their main common point is they’re not original AT ALL. In fact, they’re sooooo boring it makes my heart ache from that lack of dareness.

As I’m smart, beautiful AND generous, I couldn’t pass through December without giving you MY version of the perfect Xmas wishlist. Thanks to that, you might be able to find the absolute gift for that annoying nephew or that crazy grandma of yours. For obvious reasons (the main being “creativity”), I’ve decided to turn that wishlist into a Xmas song (you can sing it on the music of “I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” or “Sexy Chick”, I don’t care) (I’m not the one to judge people who like David Guetta’s music).
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(© Neja)

“I don’t like cats, nor Ryan Gosling (I don’t hate them though)”*

Dear readers, I have to tell you something important. I have to confess because 1/ it’s #thursdayconfession, everyone has something to confess (and it saves you any therapy’s fee) and; 2/ I haven’t written a post for sooo long that I HAVE to criticize something for my comeback (I’m French, on adore criticizing things).
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(© Willow Smith)

“Hair stories.”

Beware of The Lady, half Sadako, half Cousin Itt.

Remember the last post? I’ve finally got my hair relaxed. What helped me opt for a relaxer was the fact I got it for free thanks to Ethnicia (I’m ready to willingly accept anything as long as it’s free: smelly cheese samples at the grocery store, herpes, a 30-minutes access to a porn website or compressed hand towels in airplanes).

The thing is, my hair kinda easily absorb ANY hair treatment it receives: relaxer, coloring, conditioners from Patagonia… I think people at Ethnicia added some keratin treatment in their new relaxer (which – surprisingly – didn’t stink nor hurt) because my hair is now as silky and shiny as in an ad for L’Oréal. But don’t worry, my hair is not moving in slow motion (LOL). My hair is so smooth I can do the “Justin Bieber move”:

(I know every underage midget girl have now fallen in love with me but I’m not interested lil’ ladies)

As I’m a one-instant decision girl, I’ve CUT ALL OF MY HAIR. I thought it was a shame to have “so much” hair and no idea what to do with it (mainly because I’m sooo lazy). I wanted to take a snap of my new hairstyle butearlier this week, my camera was involved in a small accident (including a very heavy falling dictionary), and is know broken. The worst thing that could happen, as I’m leaving for Montreal on Friday. .

I repeat: I DON’T HAVE A F*CKING CAMERA NO MORE AND i4M LEAVING FOR MONTREAL ON FRIDAY!

So I’m gonna use my legendary ability: bootlicking people with money. People from Canon / Nikon / Sony / Kodak / whoever else; you can send me a DSLR, I swear I’ll keep my mouth shut (you can send me a BB Playbook too thx).

I’m willing to go work for DSK if it means you’re going to send me a DSLR.

(See how low I can go?)

(© Solange Knowles)

“It’s a bit far-fetched ya know.”

Before you go further, I invite EVERYONE to (re)read MayBee on Nappex (or extremist nappy girls).

So you can jump to the rest of my post.
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(© Robin Thicke)

“Week 1…”

This post was shamelessly copied from Raych’s blog.
Yeah, I said it.

Music Monday: watched the latest video from one of my favorite band EVER (I’m trying to dance like them as Jul is trying to learn part of “Yeah 3x”video’s choreagraphy).

Tasty Tuesday: the most difficult decision for me to make, choosing between two types of muesli for breakfast.

DIY Wednesday: finally found another use to my new bow clips (I’ll probably do a “CrazyBritney-tose” very soon – shave my hair once again – which means I won’t be able to use them on such short hair).

Fashion Thursday: the only thing missing is a bobble hat, big round glasses, and I’ll be the new character in “Where’s Wally?” series.

Chilling Friday: training-session for the pictures we would take @ Disney the following day.

[Only THREE WEEKS LEFT to help Fashizblack go from web to a printed edition!!!]

(© King Kanye)

“That’s what you call flexitarism!”

“Hello everyone…”
“Hello youuuu”
“My name is Hak’ and I’m… a flexitarian.”
“Welcome Hak’!”

Last month, I’ve decided to go vegetarian for a week (I do that very often). Nothing crazy: my skin didn’t start to glow (I’m not a vampire from Twilight) and I didn’t sweat 100$ bills (if only).

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